May 2003 Ratings System:
++ Christian - made specifically by Christians for Christians
+ Secular - but contains nothing offensive to most Christians, probably made by Christians trying to exert influence in secular media.
M Mature content. Not necessarily offensive, but parents should be careful before allowing exposure to children and pre-teens.
X Mature content. For mature teens, firm in their convictions and morals, who have received much parental guidance.
XX Contains very mature, problematic content. Parents should seriously consider restricting exposure to teens.
XXX Completely offensive. Not only should teens be restricted, but adults may want to question their own exposure.
The Game / Documentary / XXX
I guess the hook is that the disc is a documentary of what real life is like for this rapper named, "The Game." He sings about lesbianism, prostitution, and drug dealing, and that's only in the first song, "Hate it or love it". He pleads that this life is the only option open to him to survive and make his mother happy. It's certainly sad if it's true, and even sadder if it's not true and he just wants to tell people it's true just to make a buck. I'll give him this credit though: at the end of the song, he thanks his mom for not having an abortion.
Akon / Trouble / XXX
Just another rapper (see above) trying to make a fast buck using the same old formula that's worked for the rest of them: Sing about dealing drugs, womanizing, gun carrying, and prostitution, etc. In the hit song, "Lonely" the rapper describes his desperate state of loneliness after his girlfriend leaves him. Unfortunately, he has tied up his entire sense of self worth in his relationship with this girl, that he literally has nothing left once she leaves. I try to tell the students constantly that when you base your self worth on your boyfriend or girlfriend, it becomes about your needs and desires - a very selfish point of view. The healthy thing to do is base your self-worth on your standing as a redeemed child of God. Then you will have much to give to those in need and in your relationships. Nobody wants a lonely and needy person, but everyone is attracted to someone with much to give.
Natalie / Going Crazy / XX
Natalie doesn't use the four letter words that Akon and The Game use, but her songs are the corollary to theirs. No good.
Frankie J / The One / XX
Ok, I'm either on a roll this month, or the music biz is. The charts are dominated by rap act after rap act rolling out either filth (The Game and Akon) or songs about selfish love. Frankie J sings about a woman he is attracted to. The only thing he can find to like about her is the outer qualities: her sexiness, her beauty, etc. and he says that she is one to keep simply because she is a perfect 10. Frankie J doesn't use many bad words, but his message is distorting reality, setting unrealistic expectations for our culture.
Will Smith / Lost and Found / M
Thank you, Will, for restoring my faith (somewhat) in music and even in rap music. Be warned, Will drops the 'D' word a few times on this disc - but the themes he sings about are a breath of fresh air after the music I've reviewed so far this month. He asks to be loved despite his looks, he says his fans make him want to stay 'strong and moral', he even confesses that he prays before writing his music. While I doubt that the 'D' word was divinely inspired, it's nice to hear a rapper even considering God's opinion of his lyrics. He even has a song, "Scary Story" in which he deconstructs the myth of the rap star lifestyle.
The ignominious end of 93.1 WDRQ
I came back from Mexicali this year to find a surprise on my radio - 93.1 had changed formats, from intense rap and hip-hop to 'DOUG-FM'. I can't say it's a bad thing. I can't say I'm surprised that they couldn't make a profit playing trash and filth one song after another. Unfortunately, this leaves 95.5, still playing 95.5% immoral lyrics, reigning the Detroit pop music airwaves.
Parenting Teens
Laurence Steinberg, professor of psychology at Temple University, offers this advice, drawn from the latest studies of adolescents, for the parents of teens:
WHAT YOU DO MATTERS: Good parenting can help teens develop in healthy ways, stay out of trouble, and do well in school.
YOU CAN'T BE TOO LOVING: Lavish on the praise and physical affection (though maybe not in front of their friends).
STAY INVOLVED: Don't withdraw when your kids become teenagers - they need you more now than ever.
ADAPT YOUR PARENTING: What works at one age might not work at another.
SET LIMITS: Kids need love first, but a close second is structure.
FOSTER INDEPENDENCE: It's healthy for teens to push for autonomy - give them their psychological space.
EXPLAIN YOUR DECISIONS: Your rules and decisions must be clear and appropriate - the days of "Because I said so" need to be over.